I feel so isolated

I knew this would happen. The last 8 months, I've always thought to myself "Having a small baby who naps two to three times a day (in her crib), is pretty isolating, because I have to be at home so often. I can't even imagine how isolated I'll feel in the dead of winter...".

Here we are, only three days into the snowy weather, and I'm already tearing my hair out. I had one crying episode today (it was only momentarily, but still...). I've started trying to organize myself so that I make it through this season emotionally intact, so hopefully I'll have some success gearing all my friends up for daily (or even twice daily) playgroups and, on decent weather days, outings. I hate days when I can't get out of the house. They make my skin crawl. I get very upset and I do irrational things, like willingly go out driving in blizzards, just to escape for a while.

Part of organizing myself to not be bored and indoors all day requires me to open my house, as often as possible, to friends so that they can come over and play with their kids. I LOVE having people over. I even love it when people drop in unannounced. It shows that they feel comfortable enough with our friendship to do so. It's great. But the only thing is that I'm starting to feel a little self-conscious about the state of my home on such visits. It's kind of a mess around here. I mean, it's not the end of the world messy, but I've noticed that many of my friends have these really modern-style homes with minimalist decor, clean lines and clear surfaces. My husband and I subscribe a more "proudly display all of your worldly possessions" kind of philosophy. We have bookshelves stuffed with books, mantles covered in photos and frames, coffee tables covered with newspapers and coffee table books, side tables with statues and plants, and toy boxes FULL of toys. I'm not saying our house is a pig sty, but make no mistake...you can tell people live here! You won't wonder if a home magazine shoot is about to take place!

And another thing is that some of my friends have bemoaned the absolutely "crazy messy" state of their homes before inviting me in, only for me to later realize that their "crazy mess" looks better than my home does right after my cleaning lady leaves. Sigh...

I think I'll have to try and do better. I'll let you know if I succeed!